youre not supposed to be here... well "here" in this instance is nowhere. nada. null. void. you get the point. who am i, you ask?? well, i am lucas as of 7:52 PM on july 30th 2023!!!! ive been lost in this sea of FFFFFF for quite some time now.... walking in circles, squares, various other polygons.. or whatever.... been looking for a way home for quite some time now... no water, no food, no dark souls, no music...... ugh if only there was a "a href="https://lucas.cash" class="link">home" around here.... well it is pretty peaceful in here i will admit that. BUT if you do happen upon a way out of here, please do let me know. i miss my dr pepper, especially that cherry flavor... it is weird having somebody else here. usually its just me and just like you know... nothing. i actually dont know if my thoughts are always spread out bare in a unicode format just to be read by somebody else, if so that would be pretty scary. just being bare and vulnerable to somebody i may not even know. but i guess the way things are now kind of obscures that between us. you and me and seperated by a veil of pixels radiating light into our eyes and against our skin. imagine telling somebody who does nothing else but look into the scenary for recreation that one day mankind would be either gifted or cursed by this new form of interaction. would you consider this an interaction?? obviously these words will be trapped on this landscape and remain here unchanging regardless of what you do, make, say, think, feel, or whatever other state of being you are while reading this. am I communicating with you? or communicating with myself. hmmm, i dont really like to think about these things too much, they intrude upon my time that I have to search for a way out of here!...... but i guess ive got all the time in the world here. well, actually i dont think this is all too bad. the white has stopped hurting my eyes and kind of feels like a warm blanket wrapping around my eyes and, by extent, brain. orrrrr the way home is HERE!!! dammit, thought i could catch it off guard and get out.... fiddlesticks... well hopefully- BAM!!!!!!!!!!!!! i thought maybe it would think i gave up after not getting it the first time and actually become off guard.... well i guess it just simply isnt around here.. unless its HERE!!! third time isnt the charm in this case.. maybe fourth or fifth? i am not really sure.... its hard to tell if itll be right by my feet or millions of light years away at this point.. do i even have feet??? crap. ive never had to think about not having feet before. how will I get around??? i actually didnt take the time to ponder this.. but can I even move? are my thoughts the only thing moving or am i moving but just so void of responses of the area or feeling itself that i cant even tell if i am moving or just beaming my eye ball laser thoughts out into the void... this is all so much to think of!!!!!! how exciting!! i bet you out there looking at this right now cant even begin to THINK about how this would feel! hahaha you cant float in an endless abyss of lights!!! maybe this really isnt actually all that bad.. it does get pretty lonely here. i dont even remember the last time ive audibly said anything. now that i think about it i cant even tell what hearing is anymore. is it absorbing waves in the air??? or is it just taking sounds into your brain just like that. i dont really have any sort of research to ponder over in here. stupid doctors probably wouldnt know either.... good for nothing twats if they cant even help me out of this place. isnt helping people their job??? dont they get like bmws and a loving wife and kids and a futuristic looking house on the hills with the latest iphone every year for helping people??? do i, lucas as of 7:52 PM on july 30th 2023, even count as a person anymore?????? once these thoughts are pressed out into the world and away from my body, can I even consider this myself?? also I am pretty sure i have no ears. i thought about it and me, being an abstract thought, or recollection of thoughts? i guess that would be depending on whether or not I relinquish the idea that this will be nothing more than observed in the future, making me sentenced to a constant state of being in the past.... or if i am simply thoughts then you observing me is what is making me BE. that would be pretty scary. what If you go and then its back to mindless nothingness. what if you come back and its just the exact same thing again? what if this is actually all there is for me. i might need some time to think about this... if i am lucas as of 7:52 PM on july 30th 2023, will i only ever be lucas as of 7:52 PM on july 30th 2023???? is there not a lucas as of 7:53 PM on july 30th 2023? if there is, is he caught in this same exact scenario as i am in right now? is he having the same thoughts... is he taking my thoughts with him??? or am i just a split off from what would be an endless array of lucas that can exist in a digital format.... this is a lot to take in.... i think ill make this line my resting place for right now. i need some time to process what exactly i am, and what exactly i am or am not doing.... i might head back up this monstrous pile of thoughts, maybe i missed the way home above all of this.... you can go ahead.... if you see something please do let me know. no no no i wont be lonely here. if you dont end up finding it, just know ill be right here waiting for you... now go.. good luck!!... brrr, is it cold here? i cant tell..... home